Perspectives

As a first time mom, who had a ... let's call it interesting labour and delivery, I find myself a little more protective of Amelie than I thought I would be. Okay, lol, that's a total lie and I knew I would be a crazy mama bear :-) Luckily, and gratefully (is that how that's spelled?) everyone has ... okay, most people have given the space required for me to adjust and relax. As all you moms out there know, it's a big change. And ... I'm totally lying about how hard Amelie is, she's a sweetie pie (she has her moments of diva attitude, but don't we all?) I think the biggest adjustment was dealing with everything that happened immediately after she was born. It was incredibly overwhelming and traumatic.

A lot of people had hurt feelings because of things we said or did, or even perhaps things we still do. I suppose I'm a little surprised (I'm so not that surprised ... I'm not exactly classified as cute and cuddly) that anyone took offense. Most of the people that took offense are moms themselves and although I understand everyone's experience is different, surely most emotions are similar. I find that I don't exactly embrace large events and get a bit nervous if I have a lot of time to think about it, luckily ... Amélie is a cool cucumber and can handle my nerotic behavior with ease. It's also been a blessing that nobody has pushed the separation issue with us.

It is true that the very first time you leave your baby with someone else ... you're a wreck. I was only gone 90 minutes (to get my nails done) and I was very nervous. I've been able to take it one step at a time without being rushed. I've been to the movies with Tanya and been able to run errands, mostly stress free. Of course, I will always be worried, aren't all moms? I've been able to calmly watch other people handle Amelie and never been pressured to give her to someone for them to hold. I've been extremely lucky, that most people will either, ask if I need them to hold her or wait until I ask them. For that, I'm grateful (again ... is that a word?) it's made things a lot easier on me, Amelie and Corey.

I might even be able to leave Amélie with someone other than Corey and go to a movie. All in due time ;-) You know ... I don't know why I called this perspectives ....